The date is April 23 1999. I have access to a nice laptop and I feel the need to write my revisions and additions.
I spent most of 97 in Lodi looking at an oil tank on the other side of 414 when I was a live in baby-sitter for my cousin Dale. The lil bastard I served is Michiel Hollister and he is now 8 years old. He has taught me more about myself than anyone and I now have complete empathy for my parental units. The child is me -I was him. All these traumatic lessons, instant tears...He forced me to be an authority yet I feel 8 myself. He plays with fire and and his elders shun him, learning is getting burnt and he knows it, so he indulges the elders authority trip and plays anyway...
His phases of growth are amazingly like mine, but he is learning even faster that adults ain't right in the head. He doesn't understand his daddys stress and his daddy doesn't remember the newness of childhood. He is obsessed with toys and cartoons, a refuge fantasy world; this harsh world forces him to retreat into his imagination. They are creating this cocoon which protects the innerchild as it secretly morphs into a little god. Soon his sisters will tell him to "grow up" and he won't. Then one day he will be ancient and nobody will know why. This kid has faith in me. When he asks if my spaceship is built yet and I tell him it is going to be a few more years, he says its pretty special to have me for an "uncle". Mikey knows his uncle Mat will be famous but as his daddy told him, "worry about making yourself famous."
I spent most of 98 working a series of McJobs and smoking pot. My friendship with Loden "counting water" has flourished and I feel he is the only man I can truly trust right now. Loden has been here for me since this shit started, he never hesitated to kick down some herb or munchies to me and more importantly he taught me about Archeoastronomy, geometry, earth grids and countless random shit from Salvia Dinorum to School of the Americas. He is in the same boat I am in. Working on fringe stuff nobody else can appreciate, occasionally meeting people who bring him another piece of the puzzle, waiting for cartography software...When I told him I was the christ it wasn't a big deal cuz we are from Ithaca...He thought it was neat that I am just like the character in his Scorched Earth comics and found more validation in that than my actual prophecy. I truly love this guy and I hope he doesn't feel like my star is shining too bright next to his. The fact we are friends should tell him we go WAY back, like he said, I build the spaceship he makes the map. We started a mad scientists club and have felt the knowledge pour down. We got some Pagans and chemists to round out the bunch, hopefully it will grow after I have some money to give.
I have stumbled upon the Dolores Cannon books Conversations with Nostradamus and I now know for certain I am not insane. My inventions are in there, my artists police sketch is in there, my bong is even in there. Nostradamus says that the title of antichrist is not accurate because it is a Christian term and I am not Christian.
Dolores failed to notice that the great genius and antichrist are both inventors. Seeing as how she is the person who provided me with my only corroborative evidence for claiming this title you'd think she would be the person most likely to believe me. I sent a copy of this manuscript to her hoping Ozark Mountain Publishing would be the one to give me a break. She said I was not the first person to come to her claiming to be the antichrist nor the first claiming to be the great genius. I am the first claiming to be both. She said this was not a book and that nobody would publish it, and she is right. I don't understand why she rejected me. I guess its because she is an old lady and is easily offended, maybe its because she lives in the bible belt and knows that her Christian friends and family would disown her if she was responsible for outing me, never mind the nature of HER books...My only other idea is that she is pissed that her work was not 100% accurate. According to her books I am supposed to be two different people, from the middle east and I am supposed to have a large support group who are preparing the way for me. Then far in the future, after the evil antichrist does his thing, the great genius (whom she speculated to be Jesus) shows up and makes it all better. The antichrist is a real humanitarian at first and helps 3rd world countries tremendously with his inventions then he flips his shit for no legit reason, demands that people worship him blah blah blah...y'know its funny, Christians surrender their whole existence to Jesus (which is pointless) I wonder if he actually demanded that they should do so if they still would? Nostradamus provides enough info to identify me but not so much that you don't need to use discernment, he intentionally provided less than accurate info for the same reason Daniel did and John did...
Her books are great and I love the work she has done, its a shame she is so afraid of me, if I was regressed there is no telling what we could download...because she rejected me it made me think, to truly fulfill prophecy or to even get noticed I have to use the World Wide Web, it has authority over all nations, lands, and tongues - screw publishing houses, useless middlemen as far as I can tell.
OKAY, I'm connected to the middle east because that's where I will be creating the most conflict (both spiritually and economically) and the great genius is so far in the future because that's how long it will take before I am considered by everyone to be a servant as opposed to a tyrant. I am evil but I have done nothing. There are quatrains that attribute ww3 to me, nukes and stuff...yawn. I just don't see it happening...I have such more interesting means of destroying the establishment, what I can't nihilate with words the earth will nihilate with grid warpage, besides I don't have access to these weapons and no desire to know how they work.
This winter I went on public access. I struggled with how much to divulge, I ended up hinting, I received no response. Either Ithaca is saturated with wackos to the point where a Christ complex is common or...who the fuck knows, I just know that it didn't result in my success for a reason.
I sent copies of the show to Art Bell, Laura Lee,Integrity Research Institute, and the fella who is my mentor, Ogmios/Imam. I know this dude ain't evil even if I am. He wants to retain his anonymity and I respect that. He worked for G.E. as a consultant, and really all he did for me was teach me some basic electronics of which I know very little as my head is constantly in the fringe, damn I need some more schooling.
I went online recently and fer shits-n-giggles I searched with these two words: antichrist+inventor...one of the things Google found for me was a misc. study called, THE PRINCE OF THE POWER OF THE AIR PLAYS A MEAN HAARP. The author saw how Tesla was or could be the antichrist, although there were stretches I found it interesting that someone other than myself would make that connection.
I went to the mental health clinic to get some answers to some pertinent questions:
what is the definition of "psychosis"
what is the definition of "Christ complex"
I told them I wasn't there to be cured but to get a general evaluation of what clinical psychology deems crazy and to differentiate the symptoms of your average fake prophet from the actions of a bona fide godhead representative. I told them that I did not think I was crazy because I could explain how I got to this point. The woman who diagnosed me was biased I believe and didn't want to even consider if I was who I claimed to be. She was not objective and sought a scapegoat - she found it in pot...She said I was not psychotic and that the complex was cannabis dependent, It is in a manner of speaking, odd how fundies treat my floral counterpart in the same way as I am treated; we come to serve and you crucify us with reefer madness...
She pressured me to take an anti-psychotic in order to see if I would give up the notion of being the christ, I mean she really PUSHED it on me, as if she was getting kickbacks from the pill makers. Ironically the predecessor drugs to the one they were going to give me "made people into zombies" which I assume means spaced out and torpid Pot already does that...and pot has actually been prescribed as an anti-psychotic. As I gave it more thought I concluded that:
Basically psychosis is a matter of opinion, its weighing an individuals thoughts and actions against the norms of the society/culture the individual exists in. If the individual isn't interfacing with the norms in a acceptable way he/she is "psychotic" whether the thoughts/actions are admirable or despicable. By their definition anyone who has psychic ability is psychotic.
To the degree that they are ignorant of the "cure" they are equally ignorant of the cause, which in this case is my free will. They ask "what if" I am wrong and I am not who I claim to be. Until someone else more credible than myself comes along that question remains open.
The only conclusion I come to is that what clinical psychology "thinks" is irrelevant and if the worlds opinion of me were contingent on a professional evaluation we're ALL FUCT, but its not, this is an issue of faith, for myself and everyone judging me. The mental health industry / pop pschology is now on my shit list, with the pill pushers, petroleum pushers, lobbyists, politicians, bureaucrats, meat industry, the christians and the physics luminaries etc...
Most people don't picture EDEN or heaven or New Jerusalem as a place where technology is needed...yet most people can't imagine life without it.
All technology exists because we as a species are capable of producing it. Whatever we are capable of is a result of the intent of the inventor who produced us. God and technology are synonymous, the only difference is in the materials or rather degree of refinement. Lets say the human race is organic technology. A means of transmuting psychic energy for the purpose of ascending a planet out of the explicate before entropy renders it useless. What we call technology is organic in origin and its purpose is to spread a communication network throughout the morphing stage of a planets ascension in addition to Gaia feedback. It is a crutch for a species that maintains by changing from beasts to angels, its the transition facilitator between grunting and telepathy.
Technology isn't just necessary it just is...